Patient: I want to go to the library.
Nurse: What book do you want to read?
Patient: The pokey one.
Nurse: What’s it about?
Patient: A dog that lives behind the library
Nurse: What’s the dogs name?
Patient: Pokey!
Nurse: What does pokey do?
Patient: He bites people and eats bookworms.
Nurse: Who wrote it?
Patient: I did. Just now.
Nurse: Now I can’t wait to read it.
Patient makes magic noises while waving her fingers: “there’s joy in hunger”
“Something about you belongs with the fried spirit people.”
“I tried to cross the desert so I could see the farmland.”
“You are the dew on my rain flowers.”
“I got to pull on my duck but not sure I can make him quack.”
“I’m going get an orange blossom and plant it for your glory, my spiced friend.”
“You’re as pretty as a lamb on the hillside.”
“But nothing beats the United States of salmon”
“Does Switzerland have a moon? If it does, I love you to Switzerland and back.”
Nurse: Happy hump day, Love.
Patient: Oh yeah, who are we humping?
“I’m watching your ears wiggle, if your right foot claps, it’s a bad omen.”
“Don’t let your worker bees lose their spots.”
Nurse: A lot has changed since you were young. Did you ever think people would be stuck to phones they carry in their pockets?
100 year old Patient: No, I guess I would like a time machine to tell you all to get a life.
Nurse: You need a time machine for that?
Patient: I need one to prove how stupid this conversation is.
Nurse: Say my name.
Patient: Squirrel Dog
“You better get off your ass because that’s where the information is coming from.”
“I’m listening to the sandman across the moon. He told me you ran away too soon.”
“You need a hard bodied young man to stick you in a rainy ditch somewhere.”
“Did you see the giant mushroom that attacked my car?”
“What are you doing to intimately dehydrate me before dinner?”
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