Nurse: “Do you have a pacemaker?”
Patient: “No, but I do have a cell phone.”
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Archive by Author | Amy Moloney
Honestly Connie
“Honestly Connie, I’m upside down before I can even shit in the can.”
Burning Bright
“I saw you burning bright yesterday and worried I’d have to touch you.”
Milkshake Wheel
“I’m going to dive into you and find that spinning wheel of milkshakes.”
Pain Donation
“I’m donating my pain to the young man with the black eyebrows.”
Turn it off
“This dress is beautiful but I can’t get anybody to turn it off “
Don’t Panic
“Don’t panic, these are red shoes.”
