“If I was a cannibal I’d only eat doughnuts.”

“Watch out for that nurse, she’s got a case of the sillies.”

“I’d ask you to jig for me tonight but gravity is still here.”

“I got to sit my big fat biddy down.”

“I think I’ve caught the restless condidiliations.”

“Who is The Shaper? Are you The Shaper?”

“Do you want a place in my spell?”

“Her name is Satan’s Ankle. Or was that Santa’s?”

Nurse: “How are you today?”

Patient: “Learning more than yesterday.”

“I’d throw money to be in your skin, Ireland.”

“I didn’t spend any money on myself until I found myself in jail.”

“I don’t guarantee 2 cookies but I do pour coffee like a picture.”

“How did you get stuck with us old people? And why do I get scared when you leave?”

“Well if I have to stay here at least you let me sit downwind.”

“After a while all your dribble runs out.”

“My personal demon, Robin Ranshack, blacklisted me from hell.”

“Do you feel that, it’s my ghost toe.”

“I appreciate the four corners of you.”

“Shall we go outside with a wallet and a bow tie?”

“The man came in colorless and put a bomb in the toilet paper.”