“I’d like to make a call to whatever airline is making beer runs.”

“I just want something to make my heart go zip-zap-how-bout-that.”

“We go together like slugs in the night.”

Patient: “You look like you swim a gay ocean. Do you row your boat in that sea?”

Nurse: “No Sir, I seem to always end up rowing on the Dead Sea.”

“You guys have really gone up my summer hole.”

“The night I wanted to strike, you put asparagus in the soup.”

“No wonder you can’t get out of this shit hole, your face is a dead zone.”

“Lady, you’re crazier than a hotel manager in a Cadillac.”

“You’re walking on dead grass today, Lady.”

“I’m going to push this dog right up your nose.”