“So this is like summer camp, huh?”
Summer Camp
“So this is like summer camp, huh?”
Nurse Bitterpill
Pills On The Train
“When are you going to put two pills on the train?”
Tomorrow
“I don’t go here. I belong to tomorrow.”
All The Colors
“Do you paint with all the colors when you kiss me?”
Moon Candy
“I want to eat your moon swept candy.”
Come Out Home
“As far as you want, as far as you get, you’ll always come out home.”
Go Forth
“Keep on riding and we can go forth.”
Tardy
“I’m tardy for your kisses tomorrow.”
Say My Name
Nurse: “Hi, my name is Amy.”
Patient: “I bet they call you Carmen.”
Vocabulary World Problems
Patient: “Did you teach them those big words?”
Nurse: “Nope. They discovered vocabulary on their own.”
Patient: “Good, you can argue with them in multiple syllables.”
Die a Little
“I die a little every day. Thank god you know CPR.”
Walker Phone
Patient: [holding a walker] “Can I call out on this thing?”
Nurse: “No. I don’t think that walker makes calls.”
That Old Saying
“It’s like that old saying goes; 100 times you’re right then its too good to be your gift.”
Whiskey Eggs
“Can I have a jigger of whiskey with these eggs? They’re not happy enough.”
Lipstick Pain
“Have you noticed how badly the lipstick matches my pain?”
Rain Gathering
“Do you object to my setting up a rain gathering?”
Smiles
“Every time you smile, I smile, and that’s how smiles should work.”
Dancing Shoes
Patient 1: “Are your dancing shoes going to paint the town yellow?”
Patient 2: “Where are you going to get the paint?”
Patient 3: “From you shiny soles.”
Special Medicine
“You got that special medicine that keeps me from murdering her?”
Moon Voodoo
“Where’s mama and her merry moon voodoo?”
Nurse Bitterpill [dot] com 