“Your magic is dumb.”
Magic
“Your magic is dumb.”
Alzheimer’s quotes
Barrel
“Help! I’m in a barrel without any hope.”
Shower
“I try to keep in touch with my ten year old shower.”
Robert Redford
Nurse: “That’s Robert Redford on TV.”
Patient: “Can he have breakfast?”
Nurse: “I’d love to have breakfast with Robert Redford.”
Patient: “Only if he cuts that shit off his head.”
Nurse: “I kind of like his hair.”
Patient: “You’re the reason he doesn’t make movies any more.”
Noise Chute
“You better put those foreign feathers back up your noise chute.”
New Movie
“For God’s sake, we’ll never have a movie if we wait for you to make it.”
Give Me a Kip
“You never come home and give me a kip.”
Get Even
“I’m so glad you love me enough not to get even.”
Complaining Dance
“The more you complain the more I dance.”
Moon Temperature
“I don’t want your moon temperature water!”
Breakfast
“You’re the breakfast ovary.”
Buzzing
“You’re buzzing it down so fast.”
Conversations with Jesus
Patient having conversation with herself:
“Jesus, are you here?”
“No. I’m not where you are.”
“Jesus, did you sneeze?”
“No, I’m on the train with Melinda.”
“Mama Mia, I’m going to fall into your nose.”
All the Kinks
“I’m not sure if I have all or both kinks.”
Pie School
“I bet you got all D’s in pie school.”
Rabies Bed
Patient: “What did you do with my rabies bed?”
Nurse: “Your bed has rabies?”
Patient: “It will when I get through with it.”
Good Dreams
Nurse: “Did you have good dreams?”
Patient: “Just another pillow on the highway.”
Four Seasons
“For the love of Four Seasons, cease and forget that song.”
Boy Wonder
“I’m gonna go eat boy wonder.”
Runny Rain
“I can’t renendor when the rain is running.”
Nurse Bitterpill [dot] com 