“I’m going to fill your face with jelly so you can be pretty again.”
Jelly Face
“I’m going to fill your face with jelly so you can be pretty again.”
Alzheimer’s Quote
Lucky Leopard
Patient: “Help! I need help.”
Nurse: “What do you need?”
Patient: “I need something that can turn me into my neck.”
Nurse: “Do you have a sore throat?”
Patient: “Yes. And a leopard named Lucky.”
Toss the baby
“Can yo toss me that baby, I’ve got to make some changes.”
Garden Gospel
“I raised the hair of ivy in me.” -singing like a gospel song
Drilling
“They’re drilling for furniture.”
Stop Talking
“Where do I go to stop talking to people?”
Out of juice
“You took all the juice out of me. Now I’m a chicken wing.”
Dyslexic
Nurse: “Oops, I think I’m dyslexic.”
Patient: “That’s ok, I’m Irish.”
Baseball Diamond
Patient: “What’s that lake around him?”
Nurse: “That’s not a lake, it’s a baseball diamond.”
Patient: “It’s not shiny enough.”
Pheasant
“You are so good you make everyone else a pheasant.”
Signature Airplanes
“He is going to charge me for a signature airplane then scare me into making babies.”
Hair
“I don’t have anything in my head but hair.”
Thunder Tubs
“If I had thunder tubs I’d help you.”
Love Letters
“Will you write me some love letters to put me to sleep?’
Hammock
“This fella looks comfortable, like a hammock in a basket.”
Germ Warfare
“Those germs just reached up and hit me in the face.”
Mad 8
“I think you have to go to mad 8 before I can be satisfied.”
German Passenger
“Maybe you can put your German passenger back on.”
Sunday Mouth
“There’s something funny about my mouth on Sunday.”
Any Banana
“What, your name is Bite Any Banana?”
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