“Because the why is often filled with nothing in there.”
Because Why
“Because the why is often filled with nothing in there.”
Duct Tape
“You look like you could use some transcendental duct tape.”
Playing
“I’ll be playing in the ubie-ubie bush.”
Saturday Night Live
“Lady, you should be dropping your balls on Saturday Night Live.”
Water
“Please, I’ve had enough of this hydrated water.”
Desserts
“I’m trying to find a way not to pay for all the desserts I plan to eat.”
Big Libby
“Big Libby, you go fit your ass in the mailbox.”
A Bell On A String
The story of a Bell on a String
A few days ago a resident gave me a small bell tied to a string. She said that I should ring the bell to know what I mean to her.
This is what that bell tells me every time it rings: “I may not remember your name but thank you for being here for me, keeping me safe. I may not know exactly what you do for me but I do know that when I see you I smile and I laugh. You may fade from my thoughts when you walk away but you are always in my heart guiding me to experience joy in my every day. And when you leave here after a long shift feeling as though you may never recover from the exhaustion of being a nurse, ring this bell and know that you made a difference in one life today.”
I keep this tiny bell on a string in my car so that every time I leave the office I am reminded of making a difference in at least one life every day.
Keep Looking Up
“Keep your eye overhead and you’re liable to catch the worst human or at least a donut.”
Never Forget to Love
“I never forget to love the ones who love me.”
Crabs
“I guess unless the crabs throw up, we’re home free.”
Conversation About the Weather
Patient 1: “What’s the matter with him?”
Patient 2: “I think the weather’s just fine.”
Patient 1: “Shouldn’t rain until his wibblies get to wiggling again.”
Friends
Nurse: “I’m glad you’re my friend.”
Patient: “I’m glad you decided to eat glue.”
Trouble
“You’re the kind of trouble everybody wants to get in.”
Five Cents
Patient: “How much money do you have?”
Nurse: “About five cents.”
Patient: “If you had seven cents I’d marry you.”
Nurse: “The story of my life, always two cents shy.”
Tai Chi
“I have my tai chi on backwards.”
Computer String
Patient: “What do you need this for?
Nurse: “It’s my computer. That’s where all my information is stored.”
Patient: “The stringy parts and all?”
Gin Freeze
“Who’s the gin freeze in your ear?”
Soldier of Love
Patient: “Are you a soldier here?”
Nurse: “I’m a soldier in the army of love.”
Patient: “You must have 77 caliber kisses.”
Jack of All
“You’re a jack of all parades.”
Nurse Bitterpill [dot] com 