“I love that man so much I want to stuff him in an envelope and tuck him away.”
True Love
“I love that man so much I want to stuff him in an envelope and tuck him away.”
Alzheimer’s Quote Of The Night
TV
“You smell like TV”
Paper
“I don’t want you made of paper; I want you to be real.”
Lost Chicken
“How do you spin a web if you’re a lost chicken?”
Dreaming
“Since your here for a while, can you tell me if you’re still dreaming?”
Polish The Month
“I will polish the months and put it in the moon for you.”
Volunteer
“My daddy volunteered to cut the ends off of the ants with pants.”
The President
“Are you the president of the emasculation society?”
Stigmata
Nurse: “Where did you get that sore?”
Patient: “It’s my ancestors bleeding through.”
Nurse: “Like a family stigmata?”
Doors
“I like doors, they go places.”
Shoes
Nurse: “Where are your shoes?”
Patient: “They’re asleep.”
Head Music
“Can I follow you around and listen to the music in your head?”
Positive Body Image
Patient: “You are full of love.”
Nurse: “It’s true. I named my fat Love. So my belly is filled with Love. Love flows from my arms when I wave. I’m basically cocooned in Love.”
Patient: “You must be the smartest most loved woman I’ve ever known.”
Smile Police
“I wish there was a smile vaccination. But I don’t want artificial smiles. You need to smile from the heart.”
Mom’s Chrysalis
“These brownies taste like mom’s chrysalis of despair.”
Worms
Patient: “It’s a good day to kill worms.”
Nurse: “Well, the sun is shining.”
Patient: “I think I’ll use your voice as the weapon. It’s killing me already.”
Troublemaker
“I’m not a troublemaker but I’ll microwave myself through it.”
Animal Sunrise
Patient: “Will you help me kidnap a bunch of animals?”
Nurse: “Any particular reason you want a bunch of animals?”
Patient: “I just want to see them run inside the sunrise tomorrow. We all need a sunrise.”
Nurse: “Sounds like a truly noble crime. I’m in.”
Shopping
Patient leans in and whispers, “I’m shopping for a real girl.”
Nurse whispers back, “I’m a real girl.”
Two Crashing Soldiers
“Here we are, two soldiers, crashing from half into whole, where no one else wants to go.”
Nurse Bitterpill [dot] com 